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I'm Mary Obana. I help people get unstuck. We are all meant to have full joy, pure love, complete fulfillment and peace. You know what else? Each of us has a light, a unique gift that we are to find and share with the world. It's why we're here. It's who we're meant to be. But, sometimes we can get stuck. Join me as I work with spirit to help people from all walks of life, receive the messages they need to hear, so they can understand what's standing in the way of all the joy, fulfillment, love and peace they are meant to have, so they can get on with a life they're meant to live. So they can shine. Real people, real stories, starting now.
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Hey there! I hope you are joining me today with grateful hearts after spending time with loved ones celebrating Thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving looked different this year for so many of us, but even still, the time to reflect and to give thanks for all the blessings in our lives, especially with the unique circumstances we find ourselves in, is always a gift.
I am so grateful for the opportunity to have this podcast. To share thoughts, people’s stories, and to have so many wonderful guests and engaged listeners. I have been so touched by all of your emails and messages sharing your experiences with me, your feedback, questions and thoughtful suggestions. Please keep them coming! The connection to all of you honestly is the best part of all of this for me. And if you haven’t reached out to me directly, but want to, or want to be included in my newsletter, please email me at mary@maryobana.com. I’d love, love, love, to hear from you!
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On that note, before we dive into today’s topic, thank you for your messages about how to gift someone a private reading with me. It’s such a sweet idea! You’ve inspired me to create gift certificates so, now you can!
For those who are wondering, “What are you talking about!?” Let me explain. Because of my book Shine, I’ve learned that some thought a private reading was a session where I read passages from my book – and when I think about it, I can see how that might be a logical assumption! But that isn’t it.
A reading is actually a private session where I deliver messages to you directly from your very own Spirit Guide.
Ok, did you just rewind a little bit to hear that again? Say, what!?
If this is all new to you, let me quickly explain.
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We are all energy. Here, that energy exists in physical form – our bodies, objects, etc.
But, there is also energy in our universe that is non-physical. Energy that exists just the same, but not in the form that we see all around us. What I am speaking of is the energy that provides Spiritual Guidance. Those nudges we get, instincts we feel, that inner voice that is always there to serve us – that’s all part of it.
Whether you acknowledge it or not, YOU have guides. In fact, your very own Spirit Guide has messages for you, at this very moment. They always do. They know everything about you – and all they want is for you to live with complete love, joy and peace. And they always know what is standing in your way. Tapping into that guidance is like a miracle. It’s removing the fog so you can receive with clarity, what’s holding you back from all that you are meant to have, all the peace you are meant to feel. All that you must know. And it changes, based on what is going on with you.
Everyone can and is meant to tap into their own guidance – it’s always there for you! But sometimes it can be hard. Hard to notice, see, or hear the guidance because of all the noise in our heads, and the busyness of our lives. All the distractions. So this is where I help.
During a session with me, you get to hear it all. What you need to know. I simply create the direct connection like a telephone line, transmitting the messages to you. When I am in a session with you, I can hear the guidance – fully structured, completely cogent messages. This is not connecting to my guides, this is connecting you directly to yours! It’s a special experience, and always beautiful.
I hope that clarifies what a reading is, at least with me! There all lots of different kinds. Mine are always focused on direct messages from your very own guide to you.
So, if you are interested in treating yourself or someone else to a private session, you can now go to maryobana.com/gifts for more information. And these sessions are conducted remotely, so anyone can do it, from anywhere. Thank you again for encouraging me to do this!
5:55
Okay, on to today’s topic! How tuning into what we’re thinking about can create massive shifts in our life.
So I came across this crazy stat:
According to the National Science Foundation, the average person has upwards of 60,000 thoughts per day. That seems like a lot of thoughts to me! But, here’s where it gets even crazier: 80% of those thoughts are negative!
WHAT!?
Ok, so what does that mean for us, in our lives? Does it matter that 80% of our thoughts are negative?
Oh, yeah it does! In ways that may astonish you!
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Let’s go through this.
So, first, scientists seem to think that negative thinking is bad for your brain. Researchers at King’s College in London found that repetitive negative thinking can increase your risk for Alzheimer’s disease. A habit of prolonged negative thinking diminishes your brain’s ability to think, reason and form memories. Basically, negativity is a drain on your brain.
Another study in the journal called American Academy of Neurology found that cynical thinking also produces a greater dementia risk.
So there’s that. Negative thinking… not so good.
But, there’s more. Because our thoughts affect our experiences, too.
Let’s dive into this.
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You don’t have to be well versed in Newton’s Law of Gravitation, for the ball you just threw straight up in the air to fall back down. It’s just the way it works. And you may have never heard of the Archimedes Principle, but somehow when you get into a bathtub, the water level rises. It just does.
Well, there are two other immutable and inextricably linked laws that you may not notice in action, but that affects every moment, in every part of your life just the same.
And the difference between these two laws I’m about to share, as opposed to those of Newton and Archimedes, is that once you understand these two laws and become conscious of them, you can get them to work in your favor and they can impact your life going forward in remarkable ways.
Sounds like fun, huh! So let’s get to it!
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Are you familiar with the Law of Vibration? This is the first law.
Everything on this planet, and beyond, consists of vibrating atoms and particles that create energy – the Law of Vibration states that anything that exists in our universe, whether seen or unseen, has a vibrational frequency that is a function of how rapidly those atoms are moving within it.
Inanimate objects, like your car, the device you are listening on right now, the rocks on that trail… even though they appear solid, they are actually comprised of atoms too, pulsating with energy, vibrating at a particular frequency.
Even the colors you see, yeah…each are vibrating at a specific frequency. Sound, my voice! These are things, vibrations, that your brain has picked up and translated.
And guess what!? Each of us is made up of energy too, and we are vibrating at a changing rate, depending upon our emotional, mental, or physical states. Your mind is a field of energy and your thoughts – every single one of them! – are creating emotions that are sending out their own vibrational waves. Your energy and the energies of others, are collectively relating to each other every single moment, whether you know it or not, based on the vibration you are holding. And whether that’s positive or negative, they’re broadcasting just the same. We are always transmitting and receiving energy, in every single moment.
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The second law: The Law of Attraction. You may have heard about this. You may have not heard of this. The principle of this law is that vibrations of similar frequency are drawn together. Simply put, “like attracts like.”
That saying birds of a feather flock together… there it is!
So, back to our vibration. Our vibration changes based on how we are feeling; where we are putting our focus and attention.
Shame, guilt, grief, anger, hate, fear, anxiety, regret, despair… all these unwanted feelings are low energy frequencies. Those atoms are moving at a slow rate. We are vibrating low when we are focusing our attention on feelings like these. Have you ever walked into a room with two people arguing? Even if they stopped arguing before you entered, you can feel there’s something going on, right? And it doesn’t feel good. You can feel yourself tense up… people say, “That felt chilly!” That’s low frequency in action.
Hope, trust, optimism, understanding, gratitude, love, joy, peace, enlightenment… these emotional states vibrate at high energy frequency levels – those atoms are moving around really fast! I like to think they’re happy atoms! Haha! We are all vibrating high when we are feeling these things. Again, think of a time you’ve walked into another room, where people were laughing and joyful, having so much fun! How did that feel? This one feels warm and welcoming… that’s high frequency in action. Good vibes!
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Whatever frequency you are vibrating at, you will attract back similar vibrations. Have you ever met someone who says, “I always have the worst luck” and it seems true –all these unfortunate things continue to happen to them. Conversely, do you know someone who says, “Things always work out for me!” And they do… their life just seems to effortlessly fall into place. Which came first? The attitude, or the circumstance? While of course, certain situations can affect the way we feel, the principle of the Law of Attraction is really simple: your thoughts determine your experience. You will attract into your life, whatever you focus on. Whatever you give your attention to. And the law does not distinguish between whether you want it or don’t want it. It simply matches the vibrational energy you are putting out.
So if you are one of those people – things just always go your way! Your optimistic state is a high vibration place to be… and good things just keep happening to you. And you tend to notice and see all the good things.
That friend of yours, on the other hand, that always seems to have bad luck, believes this. Guess what – the bad stuff just keeps coming… and that friend tends to notice the things that just prove that is true.
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So, if you want to attract something into your life, regardless of what that might be, you want to vibrate at the same level as your desire.
The highest on the vibration scale are things like joy, gratitude, love… lowest on the vibration scale: fear, despair, powerlessness. And there are a whole bunch of emotions on that scale in between.
It’s difficult to attract love, which is high on that vibration scale, if you’re feeling insecure or unworthy, which is way down that emotional vibration scale.
The law does not distinguish between wanted or unwanted… it simply matches the vibrational energy you are putting out. What you REALLY think. What you REALLY feel is what is always going to be matched.
Here’s an example:
Let’s say you are ready for a relationship. But it seems every time you meet someone you have nothing in common. One day, your friends ask you to join them to go to a gathering – one even says, “You just might meet that someone you’ve always wanted to meet!” And you say, “That would be awesome! Nothing would make me happier!” But inside, you’re really thinking, “Here I go again. I’m sure I’m going to spend the whole night in painful polite conversations with people I have no interest in.” So you go to the gathering and guess what? You spend the evening making painful small talk to people you had no interest in.
Your vibrational energy was matched. You got exactly what you were putting your energy toward. You may say one thing, but if you are really feeling something else, it’s always going to match what you really feel.
Let’s say you want to get healthy, but all you’re focused on is how lousy you feel. Guess what. You’re going to continue to feel lousy. If instead, you focus on the joy and gratitude that you will feel being healthy, you will attract the joy and gratitude that will come from having it. And it will come. And if it’s something really important to you, write it down. Start with “I am so happy and grateful now that….” Hold that feeling! Get that momentum moving in the right direction!
Your emotions are the greatest transmitter of vibration.
If you continue to feel what you’ve always felt, you’ll continue to get what you’ve always gotten. If you’ve always loved what you’ve gotten, yippee! Keep it up! If you aren’t feeling exactly like you want to, I’ve got great news for you!
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Your experiences are just the outer effects of your inner thoughts. Yup! Joy is an inside job! And no one controls the inside, but you.
If you change your thoughts, you will change the way you feel.
Change your thoughts and you can change your experiences.
So, let’s get back to that stat I started with. 80% of the thoughts people have on a daily basis are NEGATIVE!
Are you worrying about something that hasn’t even happened yet? Angry about something, replaying how wrong it was over and over again in your mind? Awfulizing, focusing your thoughts and energy on everything that’s wrong, instead of everything that is right. Are you focusing yourself on the past which is over, or on the future which hasn’t even happened, and not enjoying this very moment? Believe me, I’ve caught myself doing this recently! This stat – listening and hearing this statistic totally raised my awareness. And has made me more conscious. And has reminded me I have a CHOICE. I don’t have to put my energy in the places that make me feel yucky.
So, if 80% of our thoughts are negative… I’ll take that to mean that 20% of our thoughts are POSITIVE.
How about every day, we build on that 20%... make it 21.. then 22… then 25… then 30…so on. Switching that negative into a positive… one thought at a time.
And our brains get good at what they do. Positive thoughts create channels in your brain so the more you think that way, the more you’ll think that way, ultimately becoming a default if you do it enough. It’s like rewiring your brain to get good at seeing things to think positively about. When you do this, neuroplasticity – the brain’s ability to reorganize itself by forming new neural connections, starts to work in your favor. The keys are attention density – the amount of attention paid to a particular mental experience over a specific time, and holding that thought long enough for your brain to begin to create new channels. So pay attention to the good stuff, and hold it. That’s really what that means.
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See, we can use these powerful laws to our advantage.
We can shift our vibration… that vibration is in our control. Just by noticing alone what’s going on is a huge step! Catching yourself when you are thinking something negative… we can decide to choose something else – think of something positive. It can be anything, even something small, but it has to be genuine, so you can feel it! And give yourself a pat on the back for doing it! You have no idea how amazing that is to be conscious of your thoughts when you’re having negative ones ad being able to shift them positively. You have no idea how important that positive energy is!
And, if in any particular moment, you find it hard to find that positive thought, I like to create a default. This really works for me! My all-time favorite secret weapon for shifting my energy and raising my vibration is to look at or think of my sweet fluffy dog, Rudy. He's got the cutest little face! He’s nothing but love. Never fails – always fills my heart immediately with love and it’s something I can hold so it’s not a fleeting thought, it’s a real feeling. Find that thing for you… it’s amazing how it can stop you in our tracks, and reverse that negative momentum. So again, shift it, look for something positive, think of something positive in that circumstance, but if you have trouble, then go to your default, that secret weapon I like to say!
But the key is to be deliberate. Be aware of your thoughts… they are affecting your vibration. And your vibration is attracting more of the same. We can use these laws – the Law of Vibration, the Law of Attraction to work in our favor! By raising our vibration, we are going to attract high vibration things… and honestly, that’s where all the positive stuff is!
I heard my niece say that all she wanted for Christmas was motivation and energy. I can think of nothing more powerful to get that than a shift in vibration…changing your thoughts by climbing that emotional scale toward gratitude, love and joy. One at a time!
If changing our thoughts can change our experiences, then changing our thoughts can change our lives. And no one controls your thoughts, but you.
Love, peace, and joy are coming! And for that, I am so grateful.
Thank you for joining me today. Until next time, keep those thoughts positive! Be kind and shine. Take it easy.